I’m not trying to immitate Munna bhai here, but this basic Gandhian principle actually smacks your enemy right in the face (or may i say heart) without you having to raise your hand even… Forgiving the other person does not mean that you are too weak to get back at him/her. Infact, it means that you are more mature and have the authority to dismiss the issue by simply overlooking the mistakes of those who are still to reach that level of understanding. Yes, of course I believe that forgiving is asserting dominance… It melts the heart of a penitent soul and creates a new found respect for you while it burns the insides of someone who actually dislikes you by making him feel small… 

    Forgiving and forgetting go hand in hand. As long as you hold on to your negative emotions and recollect the feelings that make you lose your temper you will never be able to forgive the person who wronged you. ‘Forgive’ is a very strong word actually… the word ‘overlook’ means the same and if you break the word it clearly mentions the process of forgiving. Overlook - to look over or rather to look beyond the qualities that you now see in the person and to focus on the good things in him/her. I know this can be very difficult when the person is standing right in front of you grinning broadly and you are just fighting the urge to break his teeth… You really want to give the person a piece of your mind. If at such a crucial time you divert your attention to things that you yourself enjoy, you will see that it helps a lot in controlling your negative emotions. You can even hum ‘Raindrops on roses’ from the movie ‘The Sound of Music’ in which Mariah thinks of all the things that make her glad… It works for me!!!

     Today, I really needed to divert my attention and this time Mariah couldn’t help me… What next?? I switched on my laptop and drafted this insightful post!! Hope I gave you a piece of my mind, literally!!!

       She is one smart kid i tell you.. Just 6 months old now but she can already recognise her mum and dad’s voices. One look at her and you can’t wait to cuddle her in your arms!! She has those chubby cheeks that demand an immediate kiss and little petal-like lips… Big expressive dark brown eyes with eye lashes so beautiful that they’ll melt the heart of every baby boy from the ‘Cerelac’ and ‘Huggies’ advertisements..!!

       I couldn’t help but do all sorts of stupid stuff and make wierd noises just to hear her chuckle with amusement… I used to stick my tongue out, roll my eyes, jump about like a kangaroo, whistle just like the gundaas from hindi movies, all to see that sparkle in her eyes and to hear her ‘goo goo gaa gaa’s which meant she wanted more of her crazy didi… She hated it when she was laid flat in her cradle and made it quite clear with a shrill cry which stopped immediately when she was picked up. Just picking her up wasn’t enough either, the little princess demanded that she be strolled around continously around the house or in the garden outside. Her pretty eyes were just beginning to learn to differentiate between bright colours and different shapes and designs… Show her any flashy flowery printed cloth and she could stare at it for hours as if trying to assimilate the artistic work. 

      While i enjoyed her innocence and pranks thoroughly, she gave a tough time to my mami… She refused to eat every kind of home made pudding and splurted out bottled milk with utmost ease. When forced to gulp her daily diet, she would throw fits of anger marked by flailing of those tiny arms and legs and loud tearless moaning. She hardly slept during the day, which kept my poor mami  on her feet, constantly catering to the needs of the little princess…
      
      When it was finally time for me to leave for home again, little pichkoo (as i call her), was tucked away in her cradle so that everyone could focus on the departing guest… I planted a soft kiss on her chubby little cheeks and tip-toed out of the room, making sure that her eyes were tightly shut as i closed the door behind me… Of the few days that i stayed there, the most memorable moments were those i spent observing and playing with my little baby sister. Oh how i wish that she should never grow up and that the innocent sparkle in her eyes remains forever!!! 

 Here i am now… a free bird once again!!

Free to let my thoughts wander around without having to worry about units i have to complete in limited time…

Free to slumber in my warm bed in the cold winter mornings without having to bother about completing the previous day’s unfinished work…

Free to sit on the net for an unlimited time…

Free to have long  chats with mom n dad without either of them telling me to go and study…

Free to write my blog without pretending that it is project work…

Free to read novels without holding my VLSI design book to hide the cover page…

Free to sit all day doing just ‘nothing’…

Free to have the kind of fun with friends which does not include cursing the exam paper and pondering how to manage completing 6 units in just 1.5 days…

Free to plan trips and treks and get-togethers and re-unions and enjoy them thoroughly…

Free to upset my sister over little things and have enough time to apologise and make up…

Free to watch back to back episodes of F.R.I.E.N.D.S. all day…

Free to hog on outside junk food again without worrying about getting my stomach upset…

Free to stay up late chatting wid friends about anything and everything on earth…

Free to go for long drives which are not restricted to college and back…

And finally, free to long for college to start again because i miss my routine already!!!…

             Coming back to this Diwali… I don’t know why but my mood is just not right today. The day started with a petty squabble with my sister… Though a usual routine nowadays, I was very disturbed by it. Next, I was somehow trying to concentrate on my Voice Networks book (the wretched calendar had reminded me that exams are fast approaching). After a few futile attempts to get my head into what is 1 erlang and how traffic intensity is measured, I switched on my laptop and wasted a couple of hours trying to manage my google contacts… I was in a grumpy mood all along.. Except for when I was talking to a few of my friends over the phone… Friends really have the power to bring out the best of you even in the worst of   times… Thanks pals!!

            The Diwali ‘faraal’ has never interested me much and today I was more depressed looking at all the Diwali goodies… Usually I love the evenings when I get to dress up in nice ethnic-wear, which we all preserve (literally!!) for such special occasions… But as I sat with my closet open today, I was in no mood to even primp myself!!! I was wondering about next Diwali, and whether I would get to spend it with my cousins in Houston… “The chances seem very bleak”, I said to myself, “…study for your semesters first!!!”. With that I slumped back into my chair with the VN text in front of me. My laptop was lying right beside me and suddenly I decided to post a blog (I was not sure what to write in it though).. The thought itself cheered me up instantly!! And guess what?!… as I am typing this out, I can see the gloomy clouds finally vanishing… Hey, what do you know… there’s a slight drizzle of rain too!!!

             I’ve read a few books which mentioned how men have different dimensions to react to a situation compared to a woman… I mean cummon, if your wife/girlfriend asks you whether she’s looking fat, you can’t (or rather, shouldn’t) blame her if she gets upset when you take 2 minutes to answer that question… [this was one of the examples in the book, please don't think otherwise...].
The right answer is - a spontaneous “No!”…..  Responses like “Ummm..”, “Let me see the photo from the trip to the beach…”, “I don’t know honey, u look the same…”, “……(too busy flipping TV channels to respond) “…. will no doubt be dealt severely. 

            Guys generally tend to be silent and go into their shell (box called ‘nothing’) when they come across problems or situations they can’t deal with right away… Girls on the other hand prefer to speak out; they want someone to attentively listen to the burdens their heart is bearing (for girls, all serious matters are somehow or the other linked to emotions!!)
This is where the true compatibility test begins…

How? u ask me…

              Well, whenever a guy is approached by someone with a problem… let’s assume it’s another guy friend (this happens very rarely… males have a llllot of ego to go to this step), what he does is, analyses the issue and gives a perfectly logical solution to it. He does the same thing when a girl comes to him with a problem. So what’s wrong with that??? It’s just that, when the girl comes to him with a problem, she’s not expecting him to give him a solution (surprised!!??). What she actually wants is for him to listen to her patiently, just as her best friend did over the phone (obviously a girl too), and her office colleague (girl), and her far away cousin (girl) who bumped into her by chance… Yes, she has narrated her tale of sorrow to all of these listening ears, who with their “Oh my God!”, “Oh u poor dear…”, “How could he do that?… ” had retained high rankings in her ‘Most adorable pple’ list.  When she gets a logical explanation to her day’s fretting topped with a remark that she shouldn’t have taken it all that seriously, that it wasn’t a big deal and that her boss might have been thinking about the overall business benefits before saying mean things to her… she is distraught… she gets more wild and upset on you for not understanding her at all. She lists out the few mean things u said to her the night before, the week before that and at ABC’s wedding last year (all these things are surprisingly relevant to tonight’s discussion… u wonder how!!). The weeping and sobbing had begun much earlier…Of course, by this time a typical guy would be perplexed, not understanding what was it he said that triggered such a melee of tears… The guy takes one look at the problem now before him, and walks out the door (he is in fact walking into his shell which he uses as a refuge). This leaves the poor damsel in distress more agitated and she feels uncared and unloved…

             Now, consider that a guy walks home from work… He is more silent than usual (this means, if he usually greets his wife with a “Hi”, he now utters a silent grump at the door). The lady of the house smells a problem and asks the husband (extra sweetly) how his day was… After waiting for 5.30 min for the answer, she decides to venture out in the silent woods again… “Anything interesting happened at work today, honey?? You seem rather quite…” No reply again… Clearly, the man wants to be left alone in his shell to ponder over his affairs all by himself. He was the same with his friends after work hours, but they didn’t seem to be bothered with his silence… In fact, they laughed and joked all the more around him, making him forget all about the issue for the time being. The lady still kept pestering him… she didn’t seem to understand that he needed her to just leave him alone… By this time, there’s an upheaval of thoughts (need i say emotions??) going on in the woman’s head… “Why isn’t he saying anything? Could something have happened to the shares we bought last week?… Is he quiet because he’s cheating on me?… Maybe it’s his new secretary… Oh that *****!!”… This is followed by some more random, baseless, senseless ( i know the guys would like to throw in a few more adjectives here) questioning, then sobbing, a bit of yelling,.. some more sobbing…. and it goes on… 

Get the point?? It’s the same story everywhere… Don’t ask me how i know… All i know is.. boys will be boys.. and girls will be girls… Enjoy

I truly miss those days…

when not getting ur homework done meant a remark in the calender,

when rivalry was only between school houses,

when short break tiffin was gobbled up in the 1st three lectures itself,

when the idea of playing with boys instilled an excitement inside but a  nauseating reaction outside,

when cheering for “red house” was more important than worrying about getting a sore throat,

when roses for Teacher’s day were picked out specially by u,

when a fight with friends was resolved by sharing chocolate,

when being thrown out of class made our cheeks go red with embarassment not rage,

when the ‘Champions Trophy’ meant more than the Nobel itself,

when questions like “What do u want to be in life?” didn’t require much efforts to be answered,

when the idea of fun meant sneaking outside class when there was no teacher to give permission,

when issues like ‘thefts in the lunch break’ and ‘principal punishing entire class’ were the hot topics,

 when there was a leader for every lunch group,

when boys were more shy to dance with girls, (actually, they still are!!!)

when “getting high” meant “on a swing”, 

when “drinking” meant “apple juice”, (i’ve switched over to pulpy orange )

 when dad was the only “hero”, (n still is, ok ok not the only hero) 

when “love” was ”mom’s hug”, (>:D<)

 when “dad’s shoulder” was “the highest place on earth”,

when your “worst enemies” were your siblings, (hmmm… lemme count…)

when the only thing that could “hurt” were “skinned knees”, (i still get those!!)

when the only things “broken” were your toys, 

when “goodbyes” only meant “till tomorrow”… 

See what i mean??.. now don’t tell me those lines didn’t give u nostalgia.
If they didn’t, all i have to say is that live every day of life in a way u will wish it will never end; and when it does, u’ll wake up and realise… “Hey, today is a new day, again!!” 

That’s all for now, more later

(i dunno why i edited this post anyway…)